Daniel's Tale of the Rite of Passage

An excerpt from #meeting_hall on the 2nd November 2009.

* Bailey just shakes her head, leaning forward to snag another cookie before looking at Daniel, "So…what was your Rite like? Or can't you talk about it?"
<Daniel_> "Well I can, but then I might have bored you…"
* Daniel_ smiles softly "I'm not a Galliard after all."
* Bailey grins and shakes her head, "I'm pretty sure you won't bore me. My other option is going back to knitting."
<Daniel_> "Alright then. If you're prepared for the inevitable boredom that will come from my storytelling. Oh how my Fianna ancestors would weep!" He grins cheekily
* Jessica_Highland grins
* Django laughs and grins to Daniel "Im sure you can be a great storyteller.. just give it some practice"
* Bailey giggles and grins brightly, "I think I'm ready."
<April> go for it
<Daniel_> "Well it all started out with the bastard known as Red Shard - you know who he is - bit taller than me, scarred, drunk half the time? Well he decided to sneak into our rooms and leave this post=it on our faces. Lil bastard that he is."
* Bailey grins, settling in and nibbling her cookie, watching Daniel
<Daniel_> "Now it said that time for the rite had come and we were to assemble in the Hall of Hallowed Heroes, and so down we set and lo' we did find the maps he had placed there to guide us. Not that they were particularly good maps, I mean this is James we're talking about."
* Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity} giggles a bit.
* April laughs
* Bailey laughs
* Daniel_ does grand sweeping gestures and motions as he tells the tale, giving a good show with the story
* Jessica_Highland laughs too
<Daniel_> "So we looked at the maps and we deduced two things. First, that we had to go somewhere on the bawn. Secondly that James had apparently decided to give up on maps and just draw some random lines on a piece of paper."
* April laughs
* Bailey giggles and grins
<Daniel_> "And off we marched, to the spot on the bawn, but did we sing while we went? Nay! We did not! For trust we did not the lil bastard who sent us there. Who knows what he might have had hiding in those bushes…"
* Django grins listening
<Daniel_> "We got to the clearing where he had sent us and there was nothing there. Not a trap, not a fight, not even a trail. Though he wasn't as smart as he'd have you think - he left his scent all over the place."
* April rummages in the couch and pulls out a pad of papaer with a pencil attatched and jots down a note
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Gnomes!
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> He hid gnomes in the bushes! Y'know, little garden gnomes, with the red caps?
<Daniel_> "No, I'm afraid he didn't have any gnomes… not even your common or ordinary garden gnome. I did look, but there just weren't any to be found."
<April> he peed on all the trees, didn't he?
* Daniel_ puts and hand to his chest and sighs, looking upwards "Damn shame it was too."
* Bailey laughs, "Gnomes are scary anyway…"
<Daniel_> "This is where Skye found the secret." He waggles his fingers in a 'I'm telling you a secret' fashion. "She held the map of random lines up to the morning light and she found the secret words. And those words were… 'Collapsed Entrance'. See, turned out that James had given us this ancient map instead of, you know, something useful…"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> If he peed on all the trees, better not light a match. Dude's urine is probably totally alcohol.
* Bailey grins
* Django snickers
<Daniel_> "It's worse now - he drank some of this!" He brandishes the half-empty bottle of whiskey
<Django> mmm whisky.. not quite kahluah though..
* April jots down some more notes on her piece of paper
<Daniel_> "Eirwen dug, and Skye searched and they came to the conclusion that there was nothing to be found… and so we waited…"
<Daniel_> "…and waited…"
<Daniel_> "…and waited until Skye had the brilliant idea of checking the Umbra! And so we all leapt across!"
<Daniel_> "Can you guess what was waiting on the other side for us?"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> GNOMES!
* Mary-Lou has joined #meeting-hall
* Bailey laughs
<April> lil bastard with a bottle of rhy?
* Daniel_ snaps his fingers. "I'm afraid not Taki… Still there was no gnomes in sight."
* Mary-Lou slips down the stairs quietly.
* Django tilts his head
<Django> Goblins?
<Daniel_> "Nor was the lil bastard himself present. The clearing was still empty."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> DAMN IT! Those gnomes are sneaky bastards! WE gotta kill 'em all! Kill 'em dead!
* Daniel_ grins
* Django snaps his fingers in dissapointment and grins
* Bailey grins brightly, laughing
<Daniel_> "On the Umbra side, his scent was there again - he'd been here and so we looked around and then!"
<April> he'd peed on all those trees too, huh?
<Django> Gnomes and Goblins and Elves!?
<Daniel_> "The very ground itself opened up and swallowed us whole!"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> A gnome trap! Tricky bastards!
<Daniel_> "Tumbling down and down and down and down… The whole 10 feet of falling and we crashed into a heap at the bottom, a mess of arms and legs and squashed cubs!"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> SQUISH!
* Bailey grins
* Django snickers with a grin
* April chuckles
<Daniel_> "See, now the lines make sense - they're the tunnel lines. But one way's blocked, only one way to go."
* Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity} 's tails wag, obviously in amusement.
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Inverted sideways?
<Daniel_> "Now there's no light down here, no lichen or torches. And none of us had a torch either. So we had to go in darkness…"
* April jots another note
<Daniel_> "Now, as most of you should know… Garou aren't known for their ability to see in the dark, so we faced a small problem there…"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Follow your nose! It always knows!
<Daniel_> "Luckily… I've been getting special training over the last few months. Talin and Simae Tae have been teaching me - and by that I mean beating the snot out of me until I learnt - to fight when blind and unable to use normal senses. And even then I was cautious."
* Jessica_Highland nods
* Django grins "Nice.." says quietly
<Daniel_> "And lucky that I was, because after some considerable time walking in the tunnels I found something terrible. Something I might not have sensed if I'd been blindly following my nose…"
<April> lil bastard peeing on the wall?
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> You ran into a wall, didn't you?! Been there, done that.
<Daniel_> "If only!"
* Django tilts his head
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> You found the gnome village then. It's the only other possibility!
<April> Gnomes and Goblin city
* Jessica_Highland giggles
* Django nods "It must have been.."
<Daniel_> "No, what I found was a deep pit in the tunnel. As wide as the tunnel and deeper than I could sense. And I stuck a long stick down there to check. It was far across as well. Even with the aid of my stick I could only barely reach the other side."
<Daniel_> "And this is where things may have got a little… _reckless_."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> That's gotta be one BIG gopher!
* Bailey watches Daniel with rapt attention, sipping her tea and smiling brightly, pulling the quilt tight around her
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> You jumped in the hole, didn't you? I would have.
* Django nods "Only way to go.. well I'd fly if I had wings yet.. but yeah.."
<Daniel_> "For you see, Eirwen was sure she could make the jump. Even in the darkness, with no light, and only a vague idea of distance with no idea what was on the other side… she took Mary-Lou's rope in her teeth - for thankfully she had the foresight to bring one - and jumped across the chasm."
* Django goes rigid for a moment sitting on the edge of his seat
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> And she missed, plummeting to her doom! DOOOOOOOOOM!
<Daniel_> "I can't describe how she looked when she leaped across. I mean, I really can't - it was pitch black and I couldn't see a damn thing. It's a mercy she didn't knock me into the hole…"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> We need to get you one of those mining hats with a light on it.
* April shows Taki her notes
<April> way ahead of you there
* Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity} giggles.
<Daniel_> "Unfortunately not Taki, you see - she made it across, and taking one end of the rope in mighty Crinos grip with Mary-Lou on the other end, she formed a rope bridge for us to cross."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Wow! She made a rope bridge out of a single piece of rope? That's some serious skill!
<Daniel_> "I of course, danced along it like it was a tightrope, defying death in every step. And that's the truth not a word of the lie. Not that anyone can prove me wrong with it being pitch black…"
* Django laughs and grins widely
<Daniel_> "You're impressed? So was I! And to do it in the dark as well…"
* Bailey laughs brightly and grins, watching the story, her eyes dancing
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Maybe she had it with her already, and didn't actually make it, and was just SAYING she made it to impress you. And us.
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> And for the record, I would have just floated across the pit. Rope bridges are for newbs.
<Daniel_> "Now obviously, there wasn't as much grace among the others… but they made it across anyway, with Mary-Lou valiantly holding the other end for everyone else to cross. She even refused an earlier crossing so she could make sure we all made it across. And then she followed, leaping across much as Eirwen had."
* Mary-Lou burrows herself into a quilt as she listens.
<Daniel_> "Taki, Taki, Taki… How would everyone else have gotten across if I'd just floated across?"
* Daniel_ smiles at ML
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> You could have floated across first, so that Eirwen didn't have to make the death-defying leap. Then you would have gotten all the credit for the save!
<April> but where's the fun in that?
* Django nods and points to Taki "Absolutely"
<Daniel_> "Alas, why did I not think of that? But then I wouldn't have been able to do my aerial acrobatics on the tightrope!"
<Daniel_> "Next up was another hazard… One of the most dangerous of all… A fork in the tunnels!"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> You mean, the acrobatics that nobody saw!
<April> fork tongs are sharp when you step on them
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Why is it always a fork?! Why can't you ever find a good KNIFE in the tunnels? Or maybe a Spork?
<Daniel_> "Why yes, those same acrobatics. If you like I could demonstrate after the tale-telling."
<Daniel_> "But I already had a good knife. I wasn't going to find a better one as a random pick-up in a tunnel."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Dude! It's a dungeon! Don't you know anything? You can get magic items as random drops in dungeons!
* Django tilts his head
* April looks down at Taki
<April> huh?
<Jessica_Highland> hmm?!
* Jessica_Highland comes out of her daze
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Dungeons and Dragons… World of Warcraft… Final Fantasy…
<Daniel_> "Eh, but then I'd have had to get it checked out… And our Theurge didn't have Analyse Magic Item."
<April> oh.
<Django> Oh.. right those.. yeah haven't ever gotten in on one.. sounds fun though..
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Oh. Okay. You've got a point, Daniel. Continue, please.
<Daniel_> "So, Taki. Confronted with a fork in the tunnels and a party of 6, what would you do? Split the party or go on as one?"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> I'd have the wizard summon a creature to go check out one tunnel, while we went down the other. The wizard would know if the summoned critter died, which would mean that fork is the DANGEROUS one.
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> But I'd go as one, if the wizard doesn't have Summon Monster. Never split up the party. That's how folks get dead.
<Daniel_> "Next time, I'll have Skye do that… Seems like a much more sensible plan. Personally, I was for splitting the party - cover the most ground and find our objective faster. Everyone else outvoted me…"
* Daniel_ puts on a sad face
* April makes another note
<Daniel_> "It was about this time that there were sounds heard from up ahead. One of the forks, the larger one, had eerie sounds emanating from it. Surely this was the threat that we had to face, no?"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> GNOMES!
<Django> No! *grins*
* Bailey laughs
<Django> It was just a music box
<April> Goblins
<Django> A Goblin made music box
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> With a Gnome inside!
<Django> They're sneaky buggers
* Django grins and nods to Taki
<Daniel_> "Silently we crept down the tunnel… JT and Norna held the rear in case of a gnome attack from behind and myself and Eirwen took point. Slowly and cautiously we crept forward…"
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Wait… JT and Norna grabbed each other's butts?!
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Isn't that getting close to a Litany breach?
<April> held the rear. Not held their rears
* Mary-Lou gives a tiny giggle and peeks out over her duvet's edge.
<Daniel_> "An unearthly light lit up the area in front of us, down in a pit clustered around a pool of sickly, glowing water where banes… a lot of them. Ignoring the potential gnome threat, we regrouped and started to sneak down to them.. trying to catch them unawares when..!"
* Daniel_ puts on a serious face for a moment "No Litanies were breached in the making of or telling of this tale or the events contained within it."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Gnomes came out of the earth all around you, slaughtering you all with their wicked greatswords and evil Gnomish magics! You got better, of course.
* Bailey grins brightly, curling up and sipping her tea and listening
<Daniel_> "As I was saying.. when..! I slipped on a patch of mud and skidded down the slope towards the banes. The skittering stones of course attracted all their attentions, and there I was, on my arse in front of an entire bane pit. Bugger."
<April> oops
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Why didn't you use your amazing acrobatics? Is it because there was light, and you can only perform them in absolute darkness when no one can see them, even you?
<Daniel_> "No, it's because it was funnier to fall on my arse." He grins
<Daniel_> "You have to go with what's funnier in my business."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Oh. Right. First rule of clown school, too.
<Daniel_> "Now, had I been alone, I'd have been screwed, but everyone else was there - ready to attack. So as I was scrambling back to my feet, they'd already leapt out into the advancing banes. I couldn't count how many there were, surrounding us and sinking teeth and claws into any part of us they could reach."
* Bailey chews her lip, watching with wide eyes, grinning
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Because you never learned to count! Or to read! Oh, the angst! The pathos!
<Daniel_> "So, there was Eirwen, a white ferocious monster weaving between the banes and dealing damage left, right and centre. Giving two swipes for every three she took. Or was that the other way round?"
* Jessica_Highland watches the goings on…looking tired
<Daniel_> "And there Mary-Lou stood, resolute in her fury, dealing better than she got with every blow. Her defenses were amazing, blocking almost every blow that came her way and still killing them in swathes."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Go super-girls!
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Kill all the men! Oh… wait… um, ignore that, please.
<Daniel_> "Norna let go her anger and swept among the gathered banes like a stor, her tireless Rage giving fuel to her blows and despatching banes in droves."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Pow! Paff! Zowie!
<Daniel_> "Skye ducked beneath blows, dodging and diving, giving elegant, but lethal blows to each opponent that stood against her."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> And the guys got their asses handed to them on a silver platter!
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Cuz, you know, silver hurts.
<Mary-Lou> There were lots of little ones…
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Bane Gnomes! I knew it!
<Daniel_> "JT, steadfast warrior that he is, dealt deadly blows to those he faced, and caused much pain to the banes who assaulted him but he left his back open to what could have been a killing blow had I not seen it. Having hauled myself up off my ass, and dived into the fray, I saw the bane heading for his back and I dived in front of it. The blow that might have killed JT opened my chest instead."
* Daniel_ taps the scar on his chest
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Did the bane try to pull out your still-beating heart?
* Bailey smiles softly, giving a little shiver and listening quietly
<Daniel_> "He might have done had I not slain it a moment later."
<Daniel_> "It was a long fight, a hard fight, and despite the grace of our skills, it was an ugly fight."
<Daniel_> "The banes dead, we panted in the dim light. In the pool before us was the objective that James had sent us to retrieve."
<April> his lost bottle of whiskey?
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> The Raccoon Mask, Bane of all Garden Gnomes! They tremble at the merest mention of it, and melt at the touch of its bearer!
<April> clutched in the hands of a greedy gnome.
* Daniel_ holds up the bottle of whiskey "This prize was what we were sent for. A bottle of fine whiskey sitting in a Wyrm-tainted pool."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Wyrm whiskey. Bah. I liked my ending better.
* Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity} puts his head back down on his paws.
* Bailey grins brightly
<Daniel_> "Now, we were tired, and sore, and the banes had hurt us grievously. None more than me. Our wounds were tainted, infected with Wyrm-taint and foul poisons. My own wounds burned red and weeped horrible yellow pus. But I had a plan."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Run like hell?
<Daniel_> "Beth-rhya, in all her wisdom, had - many months ago - given me some talens for emergencies. And among them were some clearwater talens. Using one on the pool, it became the purest liquid imaginable, glimmering with reflected moonlight."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> How did it reflect moonlight? Weren't you, like, underground?
<Daniel_> "Ask a Theurge - I'm sure they can explain the magic of clearwater to you."
<Daniel_> "Seizing the prize bottle, we tended our wounds, cleansing them and rested before exploring the other tunnel. There was fear that it would lead to yet more danger, more banes, or even worse… gnomes!"
<Daniel_> "But it lead upwards, returning us to the surface and to the grinning face of the little bastard himself - Red Shard!"
* Bailey grins and laughs
<Daniel_> "And with that, we returned to the hall where Beth-rhya and others tended our wounds and completed the rites necessary for us to attain adulthood."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> With his evil gnome minions, who attacked you all while giggling maniacally! You all fought valiantly, but died horrible, awful deaths, the last thing you heard was the awful singing of the Garden Gnome theme song! You got better, though.
<Daniel_> "Indeed we did." He grins. "And now the tale is done. Would anyone like to share the spoils with me?"
* Daniel_ gestures the bottle
* Bailey grins brightly at Daniel, "That was a great story…not boring at all."
* Daniel_ bows "Thank you" he comes back up grinning
<Jessica_Highland> wow
* Django shakes his head and smiles to Daniel "I love alcohol I do.. and it pains me to say this.. but thats your reward I won't take away what is yours.."
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> That was the best story ever told by a new Cliath that wasn't a galliard! Especially when you vanquished the Gnomes! Oh wait.. that part was in my head.
* Bailey smiles to Daniel and shakes her head, "Sorry, can't…and I'm sure there won't be any left come January…"
<Daniel_> "The drink is freely offered to any who would care to sample it. And it is perhaps the most beneficial drink you will ever have - no matter what your current state."
* Django grins to Daniel and then nods "Alright, I'd be happy to try it."
* Daniel_ passes Django the bottle with a grin
* Django takes the bottle and takes a drink from it
* Django looks at it and then at Daniel strangely and blinks "Why do I feel funny?"
<Django> I.. feel.. whats the word for it
* Django looks at Taki
<Django> You know when you haven had your morning liquor?
<Red-Fox{FF-Sanctity}> Sober?
* Django snaps his fingers and points at Taki
<Django> Yeah that's the word for it Sober
<Django> I feel sober.
* Django passes the bottle back
* Bailey looks at Django curiously
* Daniel_ smiles as he takes the bottle back
<Daniel_> "You'll never find whiskey that's better for you than this one."

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